The Carmen Bucket List

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Photo by Lindsay Coulter

 

How do you start a blog about your dying dog? Grim topic I know, but I wanted to open up and share about our experience and how we are staying optimistic. As many of you know, my 10 year old dog Carmen has been diagnosed with Hemangiosarcoma, an aggressive blood cancer and I wanted to shed light on how we are choosing to live with it.

Did you know that 50% of dogs over the age of 10 are diagnosed with cancer? Depressing statistic when you think about it, but the reality is our dogs don’t live as long as we wish and hope for. We know this when we sign up for dog ownership, but when the time comes for us to say goodbye to our companions it is the worst day of our entire lives. So, you can only imagine the fear and sadness that struck me when we were told Carmen has cancer and we may only have a little bit of time left with her.

Of course I cried. I cried a lot. I held her and comforted her. Actually, she was the one who comforted me. And then, after a few very depressing days, I made a decision. I decided that for Carmen’s sake I would make the most of every day we had left together. We chose to be happy, even if it was just for a short time with her. To embrace each and every moment. To laugh at the silly things, show gratitude and to cuddle…a lot! Sure I still cry. I’m not trying to live in denial and forget that death is coming. I’m just trying to choose happiness over sadness. To, at the very least, practice gratitude for the time I do have with my best friend and create happy memories and not sad ones. Carmen doesn’t act sad, so why should I. Every day she wakes up happy for the day and ready for whatever it may bring. Just another lesson I’ve learned from this special girl. Resilience is strength and optimism rolled in one. Carmen is a trooper, so for her I’ll stay strong.

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